The moment you become a mother; your focus turns to caring for your baby. As your baby grows from infant, to toddler, to little and then big kid, you may find it a challenge to a resume a routine of self-care. However, lack of a good self-care routine will, very quickly, lead to an overwhelmed and stressed-out mom. Not taking care of care of yourself can affect your physical energy level, how mentally alert you are and just how emotionally present you really are to care for your baby. Caring for your psychological, spiritual, physical, as well as social needs will allow you to be the very best mom you can be. It’s so important to set aside some “me time” for yourself even when you feel there’s just no more time in the day.
1. Meditate
Taking 5-15 minutes to do some guided meditation or breathing exercises can refresh you and will do wonders for your mind and body. There are many websites or apps (see Calm.com or Headspace.com), even cable on demand programs that offer meditation programs you can benefit from. They can teach you exercises to reduce your stress in literally just minutes. And don’t think you always have to be sitting on a mat to do these. You can be sitting in your car between appointments, walking down the aisle at the grocery store, or sitting on a bench at the park.
2. Listen to music
Whether you favorite is smooth jazz, classical, or even soundscapes, music can literally signal your body to decompress and instantly change your mood. Turn it on while you’re doing housework, feeding the baby, or taking a bubble bath. This is an absolute great way to take care of yourself.
3. Keep a gratitude journal
Studies show that people who keep a gratitude journal not only experience greater sleep quality but may experience less chronic illnesses. Journaling is free and can be done anytime or anywhere. Maybe first thing in the morning to set the tone for your day. Or just before bed to recap how many good things you experienced that day. Your list might include how sunny it was outside, finding our favorite herbal tea, paying off a debt, how someone flashed a smile at you in the parking lot at the market, or finally taking care of a long-awaited household repair.
4. Turn your bedroom into a calming retreat
If you regularly throw your clothes into a chair in the corner or leave them on the floor, your bedroom might not seem too inviting. One way to take care of yourself is by turning your bedroom into a calm, serene place to recharge and unwind. Maybe invest in a good closet system or reorganize your storage.
Additionally, buy some soft, comfortable sheets and blankets. Several years ago, I replaced all my old bath towels and bed linens with new ones. When I tell you it made such a difference in how comfortable I was in my space. I used to just buy plain, neutral colors but I took this opportunity to buy rich, jewel tones that made feel at peace when I looked at them. I’m talking bright garnet and rich purple sheets, soft turquoise and plush plum blankets. I wanted my bedroom to feel like a soothing, calming retreat that I get to go to every night.
5. Spend a little on yourself
As a mom, we’re always spending on the kids. You find some new sneakers on sale, or pick up a new spring jacket because they’re about to outgrow the current one, or you finally find that new game your child earned after doing some extra chores last week.
Well, it’s just as important to treat yourself. You checked off 6 things on your to-do-list this week. Or you finally finished that project at work. You deserve to treat yourself. Add a charm to your Pandora bracelet. Make an appointment for a facial or a manicure. Or maybe stop at your favorite coffee shop and treat yourself to a pastry and your favorite mocha latte.
I started being really intentional about my own self-care. I wanted to work on some problem areas I’ve been having with my skin so I recently stopped at Ulta and purchased two items to add to my daily/nightly skincare routine. I also recently started booking monthly visits to my barber so that my updo always looks polished, really making me love on myself a little more. It’s very important to show your children that you value and love yourself as much as you love them.
6. Get in tune with your senses
When you have a to-do-list that seems to grow by the day, it’s difficult to be fully present in the moment. Getting in tun with your senses is a great way to find your inner peace. Try taking a hot bubble bath with some lux bath or Epsom salts (Dr. Teal’s Oat Milk and Argan Oil is my fav), light your favorite candle (Bath and Body Work’s White tea and Sage really helps me self sooth on a rough day), enjoy a cup of herbal tea, or maybe listen to some smooth jazz or soundscapes. Whichever one you pick is sure to relax and recharge your senses.
7. Run that to-do-list
This might not seem like a great self-care strategy if you feel like all you do is run errands, pick up around the house, or make appointments for your family.
But there is some real satisfaction that comes with freeing up some mental energy because you’ve taken your vehicle in for an oil change, packed away last season’s clothes or reorganized your linen closet. Check, check, and check! Whether you’ve completed one task or ten, this can go a long way to calm your nerves.
8. Unplug from electronics
Sometimes you may take a break from housework or working on a project and either binge-watch a tv program, surf the web, or scroll social media. You might think these are good ways to calm yourself but sometimes they actually create more stress.
This “plug-in” can make you feel like you just have to be “on”. You say you’re going to hop on Facebook for 5 minutes, then you see an ad that takes you over to Google to check a product you think you might want to buy. Then you go over to Instagram to check your DMs. Then you go check your email and start responding to those messages. Suddenly that 5 minutes turns into 2 hours.
Doing a digital detox might help you decompress and bring you the calm you need: a few methods for this could be:
- Set aside a certain amount of time each day to put your phone down. Maybe don’t check your social media until after a certain time or maybe no email the last two hours before bed.
- Keep your phone out of your bedroom (if you use the alarm on your phone you might want to invest in clock for your bedroom)
- If you’re able to, put your phone on DND (do not disturb) before bed.
- Set aside one weekend a month to say no to social media (heck if you’re really feeling froggy, try this more often!)
9. Make a list of and recite affirmations daily
Whether you’re on your mat getting in yoga first thing in the morning, taking a shower, or making a cup of coffee, repeat some positive affirmations that resonate with you. “I am beautiful inside and out.” Tranquil and soothing energy flow easily to me.” “I am enough.” “Destiny is not a matter of chance, it’s a matter of choice.” This is a great way to soothe your nervous system as well as open a pathway to creating the life you want.
10. Consider therapy
Becoming a parent can be a joyous time but also very overwhelming and can bring lots of anxiety. Throw in sleep deprived nights and hormone changes and you have a recipe for some serious blues. You’re suddenly responsible for another little human (or humans) and they certainly don’t come with a how-to manual. If you think you might be experiencing symptoms of post-partum depression or could benefit from therapy, make an appointment with your family doctor.
